This story comes from Kinston, N.C., from a guy named Duffy who claims to like playing darts and drinking when he’s not on the job.

Duffy says the cops staked out his favorite bar several Friday nights in a row. One patrolman — using high- powered binoculars — keeps a watchful eye on the parking lot, especially after the bartender gives the "last call."

Ten minutes later a guy comes stumbling out of the barroom, staggers across the parking lot and falls against several parked cars before he figures out which one is his. All this time the cops are watching his every move.

Finally, the guy gets into a Chevy. He sits there for several minutes before trying to start the engine. The cops, with their binoculars, spot the guy’s windshield wipers sweeping back-and-forth, back-and-forth. You should know that it’s a warm, dry night.

By now, some of the other barroom patrons are leaving, but the cops are mostly concentrating on the dude in the Chevy. Next, Mr. Chevy turns on the headlights. First on, then off. Several times the headlights come on, then off.

More patrons leave the bar, but the Chevy just sits there in its parking space, not moving as the other people drive away.

The Chevy pulls forward a few inches, then slams on the brakes. Then it backs up a few inches, and again slams on the brakes. Finally, the Chevy backs haltingly out of its parking space, and pulls onto the highway. By now Mr. Chevy is the last one out of the barroom parking lot.

"We’ve got him!" the cops must be saying right about now. As the guy in the Chevy pulls away, the patrol car activates its blue lights and using the PA system, Mr. Chevy is ordered to "pull over."

The driver steps out of his vehicle and passes all the field sobriety tests the cops can think of. He’s as sober as a church-mouse.

The cops seem puzzled, and Mr. Chevy know why. "You see officers, we knew you were staking us out — so we cut the cards, and tonight I’m the designated decoy!"