"Justice May Be Blushing"
A 33-year-old New York man last week entered a plea of guilty to the murder of a Portland, Oregon, man, according to an on-line report from CNN. This particular murderer’s plea was rather unusual, if not a record among "the world’s most unusual pleas."
Let’s look at the crime: The murderer, we’ll refer to him as "Chicken Man," last year purchased an ice-cream truck from a Portland, Oregon, firm for $18,000.
Later, back in New York, Chicken Man changed his mind and wanted his 18 grand refunded. The truck manufacturer said, "No!"
So Chicken Man goes to Portland to see about getting his money back. While trying to find some official from the trucking company he came across Unlucky Smith, a truck company employee with little or no authority. According to courtroom testimony, Chicken Man killed Unlucky Smith.
When Chicken Man appeared before a county judge in Portland, the prosecution accepted, at a pre-trial bargaining session, a guilty plea from Chicken Man — thereby avoiding a lengthy trial followed by possible appeals.
What were Chicken Man’s demands in exchange for his guilty plea? The guy told the district attorney and the court he wanted to feast on KFC and Popeye’s chicken with lots of mashed potatoes and cole slaw, with carrot cake, and ice cream for dessert. There’s more, but the court withheld some of Chicken Man’s demands until after the sentencing.
He was sentenced to life with an option for parole after serving 30 years. Following sentencing, the court agreed to give Chicken Man the balance of his plea bargain — pizza, lasagna, calzones, and more ice cream.
Oh, yes, there’s one more thing: Chicken Man was allowed to marry his New York sweetheart, "Chicken Lady." The nuptials took place in a Portland courthouse. Lady Justice must have blushed.
Copyright-Bob Ford 2008
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