"Semper-Fi At An Atlanta Bank"
Tucker, a Marine who recently finished two tours in Iraq and one in Afghanistan, goes to the bank to find out how somebody managed to steal $1,000 from his bank account.
Carrying his young daughter in his arms, Tucker is standing in line when Bubba walks into the bank holding a .45-caliber semi-automatic pistol.
"Listen up, everybody," Bubba announces as he holds his weapon high in the air. "I want $2,000 and I want it now!"
This sends the bank customers into a near panic. The bank manager calls out to Bubba, "Please be calm, sir, and don’t hurt anybody. We’ll try to help you all we can."
The manager sends one of the tellers into the vault to get the $2,000 the bandit is demanding. Meanwhile, the nervous gunman continues to point the gun at first one customer and then another.
Within a few minutes the bank manager hands Bubba a canvas bag containing the money. As the bandit prepares to leave the bank he continues to brandish the gun at customers including Tucker’s little girl.
"That’s it!" says the Marine, who is already irritated by the theft of $1,000 from his account. Slowly, Tucker puts his little girl down, turns toward the bandit, and slams the side of his fist into Bubba’s throat.
Bubba goes down like a sack of wet lettuce. The gun slides across the floor of the bank, and the money spills out of the canvas bag.
Bubba is squirming on the floor, gasping for air. The Marine warns, "Don’t bother to get up -- if you do I’ll just have to kill you!"
When the cops arrive Bubba is still on the floor with Tucker standing over him and the gun under the Marine’s foot.
Later, the bank manager tells Tucker, "I’m sure we can figure out some way to restore the $1,000 to your account."
Copyright-Bob Ford 2010
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