"Texting While Driving"
It’s late on a Friday night when a city cop on patrol in Southern California sees a car weaving, back and forth, between two lanes of traffic.
The cop flips on the blue lights and taps the siren for a brief blip. The driver, we’ll call him Chester, doesn’t pull over immediately, but eventually decides to pull to the far right lane.
The cop asks Chester for his driver’s license, registration, and insurance card. "I noticed you were weaving across two lanes as you drove just now," says the cop.
"Of course I was weaving," says Chester. "I was texting my buddy in Santa Monica -- there’s no way you can text anybody without weaving some."
"Step out of the car," the cop orders.
Getting out of the car Chester stumbles slightly but continues with his rant about the problems of texting. "I know you people don’t like us to text message, but as far as I know it’s not against the law to text message," says an indignant Chester.
The cop tries to give Chester a field sobriety test, but the guy is too drunk to follow simple instructions: "Close your eyes and put your index fingers together."
At the jail Chester is booked, then put in a detoxification cell where he’ll be under close watch for his own safety. The cop gets Chester’s cell phone number then secures a court subpoena to determine if Chester was texting at the time of the arrest. Records reveal Chester was texting.
The cop makes a copy of the content of the text message for court in case the judge wants a laugh. The message read: "LOL i am so @#%@& up...."
Copyright-Bob Ford 2010
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