February 10, 2004 -

MESSIANIC MANIACS!

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Is it news when Algore goes nuts, again...

MEMPHIS, Tennessee It appears that few prominent American Democrats are taking their medications. First among recent nutcases is, as usual, former Vice President Algore, whose animal howls filled a hotel ballroom stuffed with Tennessee Democrats. Algore said of President Bush: "He betrayed this country!" Then: he said President George W. Bush took the U.S. on "...an ill-conceived foreign adventure dangerous to our troops, an adventure preordained and planned before 9/11 ever took place." So, Algore edges closer to the Ultimate Nutcase Left, which believes Bush knew about the 9/11 attacks in advance but did nothing about them.

Algore is legions nuttier than Howard Dean, the Democrat he endorsed for the presidency. Dean's former campaign manager says Dean was in good shape until the Gore endorsement, then things went to hell after that. Democratic political gurus say Sen. John Forbes Kerry, who appears to have a lock on being the Democrat anointed to lose to Bush, lives in fear that Algore will endorse him.

SAN FRANCISCO Too bad Algore doesn't have a law degree. He is definitely goofy enough to sit on the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals. The 9th Circuit also known as the 9th Circus stepped in at the last minute to issue yet another stay of the execution so richly deserved by Kevin Cooper. Cooper slaughtered four people in 1983 in a murder so horrible as to defy explanation. California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger denied clemency for Cooper, even though Jesse Jackson said Cooper is innocent. The 9th Circuit issued the stay even though a three-judge panel of judges denied it in a 2-1 decision. The stay is to assuage the tender sensibilities of the dissenting judge, who said after the whole court intervened: "There should be no hurry to execute Cooper." Sure, judge. He'll die of old age once of these days.

California has 640 inmates on death row and has cleansed society of exactly *TEN* pieces of human debris since the death penalty was reinstated in 1978.

However, they call Gov. Arnold The Terminator and we hope he gets to live up to his nickname.

Back in Texas Edward Lagrone must wish he had murdered three people in California. Edward got the death penalty for murdering Shakeisha Lloyd, who was 17 weeks pregnant with his child, and her two great aunts in 1991. Shakeisha Lloyd was 10 years old when Lagrone killed her and her relatives with a shotgun. Edward had to get his new girlfriend to buy the shotgun, since he couldn't because of a previous murder conviction. The child's mother, another former girlfriend, won't be able to see Edward get the Cleansing Needle. Family members of murder victims are allowed to see exections but she is barred since she is an inmate having been convicted of murdering a former husband (her fourth). She should be given a pass as an exception in the name of family values.

LUBBOCK, Texas Bobby Knight apparently was endorsed by Algore when he was very, very young. Knight became a legend in college basketball, despite being a complete nutcase. His latest run-in with the forces of nutballery came when he went into a towering rage after a brief conversation with Texas Tech Chancellor Dr. David Smith at a Lubbock salad bar. Well, a good salad bar always has a nice assortment of nuts and Knight was doing his part just by being there. Tech initially announced that Knight would be suspended, but backed off. If you're a nutball, it's good to be a winner of a nutball.

NEW YORK In a development that shocked two or three people, it was revealed that Martha Stewart is a jerk. A Merrill Lynch gopher boy testified at Martha's federal trial that she always verbally abused him when she called and even threatened to take her zillions away from Merrill Lynch if the company didn't change the "hold" music on its telephone system.

There was little good news for President Bush during the week, especially when one considers that nine of ten reporters are leftie Democrats. However, one bit of silver lining slimed through. It seems there was a poll of Canadians which indicated that only 15 percent of the Up-Country Frogs would vote for Bush, if they could, which of course they can't.

QUESTION FOR THE DAY: If you plan to commit murder, will you live longer if you do it in California, or Texas?