January 5, 2005 -

ASININE AUTHORITARIANISM!

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"Authorities" discern that only live people can shoot arrows.

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Now, the details...

There is little humor to be found in the tsunami. But the BBC brought us some in a story about an Indian helicopter which was dropping food and water over remote islands. The tribesmen from the Andaman and Nicobar Islands attacked the helicopter with bows and arrows. The BBC reporter wrote, soberly:

"There were fears that the endangered tribal groups had been wiped out when massive waves struck their islands. But the authorities say the attack is a sign that they have survived."

It makes you wonder if the BBC would have known about the "sign" if "the authorities" hadn't said anything.

Modern media freaks spend hours on underwear shopping – finding panties that get into a knot at the slightest nudge. CNN chief Jonathan Klein got all manner of hypersensitive panties in a knot by remarking that CNN was able "to flood the zone immediately" to cover the tsunami disaster. One newsdorque found Klein's remark "jarring." Silly, don't you think? Klein simply used a sports cliche to describe his network's coverage. Gentlemen and ladies, starch your panties.

One man whose panties are often knotted is Kofi Annan. Seems to me that the United Nations chieftain might be better at pilfering "Oil For Food" money than skiing. I say that because a friend happened to be on a flight from Jackson Hole, Wyoming with Kofi and his security detail. My pal says Kofi's arm was in a sling, so he probably took a tumble on the slopes. Or maybe he strained it trying to grab a couple of million bucks that were supposed to go to starving Iraqi children.

Once Kofi was back in New York, he ditched the sling and used both arms while gesturing and speaking as to how you and I should give more money to the United Nations so he and his pals can siphon off some that should go to help victims of the Asian tsunami.

It seems likely that convicted killer James Porter committed suicide by way of the Cleansing Needle. Porter was a no-good who figured he did society a favor by fatally beating a child molester, even though he wound up on death row for the doing it. Porter, 33, was serving a 45-year sentence for the 1995 fatal shooting of a transient when he killed inmate Rudy Delgado in 2000. Porter smuggled a rock into his cell, put it in a pillowcase and used it to beat Delgado, who was serving a 15-year term for sexually assaulting a child. "Dude was a homosexual," Porter said. He said Delgado asked him if homosexuality was something he might "dig." By the time prison officers stopped Porter, Delgado's face could not be recognized as being human. The Delgado slaying was Porter's ticket to death row. He said, "I'm the type of individual to face up to my responsibility and my mistakes." He cemented his chances for execution by saying he would kill again if he ever got out.

James Crandell, a Texas killer who committed murder in Louisiana, figured he had aced the system when his lawyers got his murder conviction tossed out on an extreme technicality. Crandell's scumbags said his trial was unfair because of the way jury foremen were selected in Louisiana. So Crandell got a new trial. Bossier District Attorney Schuyler Marvin is seeking the death penalty for the beating death of Charles Parr, 48. Crandell beat Parr to death with a frying pan in August of 1989.

Crandell's scumbags have the edge over the prosecution, which is testing a long-standing Supreme Court decision prohibiting prosecutors from trying to cleanse society of scum in a case that originally resulted in a prison sentence.

The only time I suspect that President George W. Bush has returned to heavy drinking is when he tries to promote his wrong-headed immigration plan, which amounts to opening the borders to Mexican illegals and legalizing the millions of illegals already here. Even Bush had to have a second thought this week when he found out that the Mexican government has a "how-to" comic book with advice as to how illegal immigrants can defeat America's pitiful border control policies. The book offers tips like this one: "Thick clothing increases your weight when wet, and this makes it difficult to swim or float." And for those who prefer walking across the desert, there's this: "Try to walk during times when the heat is not as intense." Bush's pals in the Mexican government plan to print 1.5 million copies.

Interestingly, the book gives no information on how to enter the U.S. legally.

QUESTION FOR THE DAY: Is the day coming when we will assert ourselves and let U.N. fancy-pants bureaucrats know they work for U.N. members – not the other way around?