February 23, 2005 -

NATTERING NAMERY!

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There's Forney and news.

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Now, details...

We had a group of science students from Forney, Texas at Cottonwood Cove this month. The thought of Forney reminded me of one of my flights of fancy. That involved buying the weekly newspapers in Decatur and Forney and merging them into the Weekly Forneycatur.

More than half of New Hampshire's Social Security recipients told pollsters they oppose President Bush's plans to try to bring financial sanity to the system. Since people aged 55 or older won't see their benefits change in any way, maybe New Hampshire's citizens figure their children and grandchildren should be able to spend the country into bankruptcy. Possibly New Hampshire should change its state slogan, which now is "Live Free Or Die." How about : "Freeload Forever."

Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton says she wants every one of America's several million convicted felons to have the right to vote. That figures. It would mean that all her campaign contributors, and her husband, will always be able to exercise their rights at the ballot box.

The "Votes for Scum" idea was a departure for the recent Hillary, who is running to the right so fast that she might face charges of trampling Newt Gingrich.

The mighty New Dork Times got its headline tongue twisted on a story about voting by jailbirds. The Times headlined: "Confusing Rules Deny Vote to Ex-Felons, Study Says." Not exactly right. Felons are felons, until that status is removed by a pardon or similar action.

A letter writer decries the fact that I make fun of former President Jimmuh Carter. I plead guilty to believing that Jimmuh was to the Presidency what Jerry Lewis was to dignity. But that doesn't mean that there aren't admirable aspects to America's worst president of my memory. For one, Jimmuh means well. And he is a Christian man; served honorably in the United States Navy and wasn't the worst Governor Georgia ever had.

And a few people really appreciated it when Jimmuh's policies drove the prime rate to 20 percent, since their CDs and money-market funds paid huge rates. Maybe in the next life we will be able to forgive Jimmuh for other things – like a brain-dead energy policy, giving up the Panama Canal and paving the way for Islamic nutcases to take power in Iran. I confess that the idea of thinking kindly about Jimmuh in the next life is bit of a stretch. Maybe it'll be the life after the next life...

Some tried to create a major kerfuffle over tapes, secretly recorded when George W. Bush was governor of Texas, in which Bush admits using marijuana in his wild days. Trouble with that is that it's not news. Bush's admissions have been on the record for years. Strictly no big deal. I thought the most interesting item about the Bush tapes was that the fink who secretly recorded Bush was Doug Wead, supposedly a friend, who is now selling a book. My question is simple and not relevant to Bush. I wonder if Doug Wead's wife is named Mary Jane?

Austin is the capital of Texas in many ways. It's the seat of gummint and also the southwestern headquarters for political correctness. Stupid acts and statements that would be attributed to simple stupidity become, in Austin, Matters of Great Consequence. The current cause celebre for knotting lace panties in Austin comes because some dumb cop sent an instant message to another cop while a popular African-American hangout was going up in flames. The dump cop's message? "Burn, Baby, Burn."

We don't know if the cop was white, brown, black or green, but it was a stupid thing to say. However, the dumb cop might be able to defend his statement on grounds he was observing Black History Month. After all, the phrase "Burn, Baby, Burn" became famous in the Newark and Detroit race riots. "BBB" came from the mouth of black militant Stokely Carmichael, who also is credited with the rallying cry of "Black Power."

Stoklely is remembered in some circles as a civil rights leader and in others as an energetic nutball. Stokely died at age 57 in Guinea (under the name Kwame Ture) of prostate cancer. He once said his cancer "was given to me by forces of American imperialism and others who conspired with them."

A uniquely American character, and nutcase, put a gun into his mouth. Hunter Thompson lived a life of outrageous writing, drugs, booze, left-wing politics and celebrity. When he killed himself those who didn't know him well hinted that Thompson checked it in because George W. Bush's re-election made him nuts. Those who knew him well said Thompson killed himself because he was a 67-year-old wreck who was in horrible pain after hip-replacement surgery, spinal surgery and a broken leg.

QUESTION FOR THE DAY: Should people in Forney be barred from naming a daughter Kate?